What Makes a Post Freshly Press-able: I’ve made my decision

Every day, a handful of bloggers are featured in Freshly Pressed. Each week, we take a close look at one post and why we thought it was Press-worthy.

This past week, the author of I’ve made my decision humbled us with the sheer courage it took to share the most personal of confessions: the choice to end their life.

The post made us think differently

The author of is a 50-something person who writes candidly about their struggles living with Bipolar Disorder. The language is plain, direct, unadorned, and above all, human:

I decided I didn’t want to live.

The blogger relates the depth of their despair in careful, reflective detail: the cyclical inability to engage at work, to find satisfaction in leisure time, and their diminished appetite, energy, and motivation to live. What struck us most is the silence with which the blogger endures the pain of depression. It made us stop and reflect: how many people have we encountered in our lives who have seemed distant or distracted, who weren’t quite themselves? What was really going on? How can we and how must we react differently when we sense something wrong?

English author Graham Greene once said:

Writing is a form of therapy; sometimes I wonder how all those who do not write, compose or paint can manage to escape the madness, melancholia, the panic and fear which is inherent in a human situation.

Through the process of writing,’s author realizes their death would devastate the ones that they love. The simple act of writing brought clarity and planted the seeds of hope. The blogger’s strength and courage are inspiring:

My life is hard, and is about to get harder, but it is life after all. As hard as it may be, it’s still better than the alternative. If I can only hold on I have to believe it will get better. I’ve survived worse, and I can survive this. I have to, for myself and for those I love.

I have decided I want to live.

Did this post resonate with you? Will you follow Share your thoughts in the comments.

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  1. I started following his blog right after I read that post. We need an open dialogue about mental illness. Too many people have suffered silently, and I’m grateful for bloggers like this who are brave enough to share their stories about handling their painful experiences, ultimately weaving us all together.


  2. years ago I struggled with depression (post partum depression). I am a Christian and I struggled for years with this. At one point I clearly heard in my mind the phrase, “You can choose life or choose death.” Simple. Actually, when I heard this, I was sitting on the roof of my house, I looked at the view and the sky and realized I wanted to choose life. To choose life is hard, difficult at times, but it is a choice. When things get rough now, some 30 odd years later, I remind myself, I chose life. This is a hard and wonderful decision, thank you for sharing this. DAF


  3. Thank you so much for choosing this post to be Freshly Pressed and for sharing your reasoning behind the selection. I found the blog to be most moving and have begun following it. In this day and age, I found it heartening that an “institution” as large as WordPress would recognize and appreciate the personal pain and situation of someone like the bipolarblogger.

    I have been in a writing funk of my own lately, and after reading this post and the bipolarblogger, I am sensing a resurgence that will hopefully get me going again.

    Thanks, again.



  4. Then there are those that just love life, enjoy writing because the relish the twist of a word or the ability to paint a picture with a sentence, or believe that long after we’re gone someone may read what we’ve written and give us new life.


  5. The operative word is “choose.” In the blogosphere, we are fortunate that we have support and respect for our freedom to choose, whatever that choice may be. Thank you.


  6. The pain and weariness of the person on the other end of our lines struck a particularly deep resonance with me. I lost a brother-in-law, a son and my mother to the same. And strangely enough, I asked the first and last that very same question “Don’t you realize that if you do take yourself out of the picture like that, how devastated we would all be?” I couldn’t ask my youngest son since he covered well and left no clues as to why.

    My brother-in-law, after hearing my plea said calmly “You will all get over it.” and my mother said the same thing almost word for word. I often wonder why she told me. I have a brother and two sisters that she could have told. (I did tell them after this session with her and they all felt that she was just “down” and wouldn’t do that. Well, she did and then no one wanted an autopsy which would possibly point out the fact that she took too many of her prescription medications. Life is difficult at times for us all. But in trying to understand in my mind why… I came to the knowledge that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary situation. Life’s problems and finding something to hang on to while in crisis can be as simple as a warm plate of fried potatoes with that good crunchy around the edges. There is joy all around us if we can see through the fog. I know I cannot stop someone from committing suicide if they are bound and determined that is their only way out, but I hope my thought can make someone slow down, take stock and find that plate of fried potatoes.


  7. Bi-polar’s post really moved me and changed my perspective on this disease. Their strength amazed me. And I wish for them so much more. I hope they know how many people (even strangers) care about them.


  8. Both my partner and I are diagnosed Manic Depressives aka Bipolar in todays medical terms. Often we struggle with the day to day but we know we have each other to lean on for support which means a lot since we manage our depression without drugs. Which I am still trying to work out is brave? Stupid? or fool hardy?


  9. About bloody time “Freshly Pressed” had a n editorial policy makeover. Enough LITE & BRITE travelogues, cooking, cute puppy/happy family,My Diary ,My ,Hobby,navel_gazing empty-headed blogs!
    Our world is in serious trouble WordPress does nobody any favours featuring Little Mary Sunshine content!
    I’ve tried to sneak my feelings about this into blogs via Comments. Naturally my comments get deleted almost always! Nobody likes their party spoiled by Something Real. So much easier to just drink in Happy Times Soma!
    I truly hope WordPress will keep your promise to GET REAL with Freshly Pressed. It’s a R


  10. deeply brave and hopefully – in the old cliche – will help others in the same situation (that’s probably all you could ever hope to achieve as a writer).

    I’ve had three suicide attempts myself and recognise so much of what is written in this post. I have decided not to follow the blog for personal reasons – too painful, I don’t want to be a spectator of someone else’s pain.

    Thanks for spreading the word though.


  11. Krista,
    This post needed to be Freshly Pressed. I applaud the WordPress staff for making it so. I think this is another significant value of WordPress. It is a community of safe, sane people and if someone has no one tangible nearby this is a place where someone is always awake.
    I am following this blogger, to be sure. I’m a medical professional and have encountered many forms of bipolar illness, as well as a personal friend who died of complications of a suicide attempt. I was part of a community that walked through it with her for 15 long years. I shared this story as part of my comments to bipolarblogging so won’t share it here.
    But my encounters have empowered me to advocate for the “functional” mentally ill. They are in our workplace and communities daily and their struggle is constant and, for the most part, silent. I can’t help all but maybe my experience can help one or two. I walked for years with another friend and she finally became whole and healthy, not just with therapy, but with a small group of people who just listened and let her be honest. Today she is an amazing woman of great courage.
    My friend who died of complications used the remaining remnants of her life to speak out on behalf of the “walking wounded”.
    Both of these women left imprints on my life to never dismiss anyone I sense suffering. I try to do what I can. And sometimes it’s the smallest act that speaks the loudest. A small investment of time can have a huge impact.
    Thank you again,
    Alexandria Sage


  12. No. The other blog did not resonate with me. What I read was what resonated with you.

    So, how could the other author resonate with me? Ah the dilemma of reviews. The person in the middle.

    Other than that, your post was pretty good. We should engage with our less fortunate colleagues and we MUST find a way to return American Culture back to a healthier lifestyle where fewer people suffer from mental illness just because of our society ….



  13. Good Stuff. I especialy agree with “English author Graham Greene once said:

    Writing is a form of therapy; sometimes I wonder how all those who do not write, compose or paint can manage to escape the madness, melancholia, the panic and fear which is inherent in a human situation.” Thinking positively is harder for some who perhaps need a visual reminder to be positive. Like a picture a ring or something to remind them to be positive.


  14. There are reasons why people who suffer from depression suffer in silence. I say “are” because it isn’t just one reason. There are many. As someone who has been dealing with deep feelings of depression for several months now, I can only really speak for myself, but I suspect that my reasons won’t be that much different from those of others.

    I don’t talk about it with my friends because there isn’t anything they can do about it. They can’t change the thing that is making me feel this way. They can’t suddenly make everything rose-colored. The thing that is causing my depression is something that I have no control over. The only thing I can control is how I handle it, and I’m having a bad time of it.

    I don’t talk about it with my friends because they don’t really know what to say. The only thing they can seem to say is “You just need time,” or “You’ll get over it,” or (and this is the worst thing to say, really) “Why are you so upset over this?”

    First off, to ask why we’re so upset trivializes what we’re feeling. It makes us feel like we’re being silly for feeling so sad. We don’t want to feel this way. Believe me, I certainly don’t, but I can’t seem to control that I do. Don’t make me feel bad for feeling bad.

    To say that time will make things better doesn’t really help either. When a person feels as low as one can get, time becomes endless. There is no difference between one day and the next. Everything blends into everything else. So to tell us that we just need to give it time makes us (at least this is the way I feel) feel like we’re staring into a black hole and the “light at the end of the tunnel” is miles and miles away, maybe not even there at all.

    To say we’ll get over it also trivializes what we’re feeling. It’s like you’re comparing what we’re feeling to having a cold or the flu. You’ll get over a cold eventually, this we know, but we don’t know when this sadness will go away. If there were a pill we could take, like there are pills for colds and the flu, we’d all be running to the drugstore, but it doesn’t work that way.

    I don’t like feeling this way everyday. I have my “good days”, but I mostly have awful days and some of those days are really, really bad. Those are the days when contemplating whether or not you want to continue with it becomes part of your inner dialogue.

    No one wants to have that conversation with his or her self. It’s not a fun conversation to have. But you have to figure that in order to have it, a person has to be in a really, really bad place emotionally.

    I don’t know what’s kept me here. I’ve had far too many really bad days. Sometimes I think it’s guilt that does. Guilt over what it would do to my family. But is that really a good reason? I mean, it’s not changing how I feel. If anything, it’s adding to all the other bad feelings I have already. Who knows? Some people do it, others (like the blogger we’re discussing) find reasons not to. In the end, we’re going to do what we feel is best for us.


  15. This hit me hard. My wife and I have recently lost our 33 year old Son. Some warnings and try as his wife did and as we did, just when we thought we were making headway; he took his life.
    We all need to learn more about depression and what causes it and how do we treat people suffering from it.


  16. Hi Will,
    You are so right on the trouble we face today on many fronts. I feel however, we almost have to balance it with humor and smiles or we will all sink together. In my blog listed with this post, readers will see that I suffer from more than one health related and other wise serious maladies. Everyone knows I am not running around as little Susie Sunshine however a smile of silly comparison or a anecdote sometimes relieves the stress and gives us a little more strength to keep putting that one foot in front of the other. It all has its place here I feel, the laughter amid the tears, the cookie recipes and the fears. It’s life and most of us will avoid the alternative for as long as we’re able.


  17. I immediately hit follow after reading. The first part of his post, hit me hard because it is exactly the same thing my sister was describing to me yesterday, only she does not know why she’s feeling so depressed lately. I will admit his story made me tear up because I saw where this could lead if my sister does not get the help and support and love she needs.

    Thank you for choosing blogs that really make us stop and think and examine ourselves. This guy chose to share such a personal part of himself and that takes so much courage. What has resonated most with me when I entered the blogging world is how much of a community this really is. This for me is priceless.


  18. Such hope that it would be better is really worth sharing.
    To believe that one has survived worse that the present challenges and that the future holds better things, especially when we are there for the ones we love, is what makes life worth living beyond trying times.
    The extractions and narrations that make up this post resonated well with me.
    Keep up the good work Krista!