Say Something: Commenting Etiquette
Previously, I wrote about how to drive engagement and build relationships on your blog through good comment moderation. Today, let’s talk about the other side of that: being a good commenter yourself. As Michelle pointed out, leaving comments on other people’s work is one of the best ways to lure others to interest others in your own site. But some comments are more effective at this than others. Here are some tips for how to win at commenting:
- Read thoroughly. Before commenting, make sure you’ve read the entire post and the other comments before yours. Your comment should never make the writer (or the other readers) wonder if you actually read the material. Also, if your point is on target, it might have already been made by someone else – in which case, you can reply to that person’s comment!
- Contribute something of value. Every post can be the start of a conversation. Try to add something substantial to move that conversation forward. Don’t get me wrong – most bloggers appreciate every comment, even if it’s just a simple ‘enjoyed this post.’ But a meatier response is more likely to result in visits to your own site.
- Keep your comment comment-sized. If you have a lot to say on a certain subject, leave two or three representative sentences in the comment section, then link to a post on your own blog where you have expanded on the topic. This is a clever way to engage readers who share your interests.
- Don’t leave shameless plugs. One of the top complaints in the comment thread on my last column was commenters who leave nothing but a link and a ‘thanks!’ There’s no shortcut to building a readership – intelligent and thoughtful comments are the way to go.
- But do link to your correct site. If you leave intriguing comments, other people will want to check out your blog – so make it easy for them to find you! Make sure your website field is updated in your Personal Settings, so that your username links to your site. Upload an eye-catching Gravatar and fill out your Gravatar profile with your social media links and a short bio.
- Mind your manners. If you wouldn’t say it to someone’s face, don’t say it in their comment thread. Criticism is fine, but there’s no need to be hateful. And remember, only a blog author can delete a comment, so if you comment in haste you might repent at leisure.
- Be yourself. I’ve discovered many favorite blogs by becoming a fan of a certain commenter. Rather than any one comment, it’s the style and personality of a commenter that really makes me want to read more of their work. Whether you are smart, witty, or just plain bizarre – be you! No matter your perspective, a unique voice will get attention.
What type of comment catches your eye? Do you have a certain style of commenting yourself?
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” Make sure your website field is updated” — Good tip! I did not realize this until today. Thanks!
Me too!!
It’s a question of finding the balance between nothing to say and too much too often. You’ve got all the angles covered with your bullet points- I especially dislike the shameless plug
I think some of the points go for “liking” too. Its fun to see that many people like my own blogposts just a few seconds after I published them. it´s really funny sometimes.
i know what you mean about this! you have to question if those are just the people trolling for siteviews on their own pages.
Interesting. I hadn’t thought about it that way. I usually take it as a small gesture, but I appreciate comment much more — and especially the ones that have something specific to say.
As Cassbee says, but I really have to like what I saw/read. I will especially hit the like button if it is a new blog/blogger and I appreciate their work, like Maniacal Medievalist on wordpress, her work is brilliant and she doesn’t have much of a following yet. She should have and I think will have a good following one day.
i do appreciate that sort of support. i have not been lucky enough to garner that type of following as of yet, but have supported others myself in a similar way.
I’ve noticed that as well. Post a pretty long (1k + words) and there’s a “like” almost simultaneously upon the posting. There’s no way someone read the post that fast. While I appreciate someone letting me know that they viewed my blog I think it would have more impact if there was a short comment too.
I only “like” blogs that I’ve read and liked. Whether its writing style, content or something else.
That’s also one of my hates, really bugs that people like a post just to get you to link to their site and build their stats and ego! I even posted about it at one point – I prefer people to read my blog and like it because they do and follow because they are interested in its content.
I am 100% in agreement with you. Don’t “like” it as a faux way of getting me to come to your blog or to build stats…that’s stupid and reminds me too much of silly teens on social networks. If you like it then “like” it, if you don’t then comment.
That could be a whole new post just there – why do people keep adding friends to their Facebook account when they never see, speak or interact in any way? I just don’t get it!
It CAN be a new post! I’ll let you do it, since it was your idea!
If you do, make sure you ping me so I can read it.
I think it depends what is the post all about. If it was a photoblog then it’s very obvious if people just like the post by seeing the pictures because some photoblog only show pictures without write too much the description.
Agree. I do understand it if the post contains a photo. People might just think “Woow cool photo” and click “like”. I do that often too because I am impressed by a photo. However I noticed also people click like on blogposts with over 500 words which are just published a few seconds ago. They couldn´t read that fast and I do think some do really troll for their own site views in this case then.
i agree with you. i a photo blog too. and just give a little discription in my photo.
Ah, that “liking” thing.
I believe it works as follows: you tag your post with “x”, “y” and “z – and other bloggers out there that read/subscribe to “x”, “y” and “z” via the WordPress reader can literally zip down the list and “like” virtually every single blog, without so much as a “how do you do”…
I would seriously consider disabling “likes” on my blogs and posts, but WordPress has made it easier to both “Like” and “Re-blog”, without that person actually inspecting/reading the content of that post.
I have serial “likers” on two of my blogs, that I just know trawl through the reader without reading (the stats page and spark lines don’t lie!).
One day, I might name and shame them at the bottom of a post – and check back to see if they “liked” it, or not!
“the stats page and spark lines don’t lie!” Thats it. There are several things which proof my assumption as well. I also spotted some black sheeps on my blog. But I still didn´t disable the liking function yet due to the fact that there are still real readers and friends who really use that function to tell me that they liked my blogpost or photo. Not everyone is abusing the function. But some defenetly do. And they do it with help of the reader. I bet they just like tons of posts in a short amount of time as you said, so that they leave their profile everyther. I called it likebait on a blog which did discuss this topic.
“likebait” That’s good – that’s exactly what it is!
How funny…Lu, I just went to one of your posts and there he was…MY serial liker! I’ve long known what he was up to. I just knew I’d find him there.
It is a hazard, and I get far more likes than comments on my blog posts. Somewhat touching the subject, my post Narcissism: Social Media [http://flusenkopp.wordpress.com/2012/10/29/narcissism-social-media/]
i think you should name and shame and get the like – that would be an epic win and very Monty Pythonesque in my humble.
And I do enjoy a spot of Monty Python…
no you don’t!
do so to…
wait a minute, is this the half hour argument or the five minute special?
some of us lesser visited bloggers dream of serial likers…. ha ha.
Luckily, serial likers are not nearly so scary as stalkers etc.. They don’t even know they really like you! (although “likers” is most an anagram for something else – just add 1 “L” and …yikes… I’ve gone and spooked myself a bit now).
serial lickers…. ew! definitely avoid!
I wish I could like this comment!
Oof, this could be another post – “like”-ing etiquette.
Likes are great, and I always enjoy seeing them on my posts, but a good comment is even better. And I completely agree that automatic liking for the sheer purpose of bringing traffic back to your own site is not cool.
Now, I would “like” to read that
I’ve seen my share of serial likers as well- it’s lovely to see my notification bar turn orange, but not the very instant I hit publish! It makes me distrust a lot of the likes on my posts- what if no one read it all?
) and then proceeded to comment about why I had liked it.
But at the same time, I use the like button a lot- especially when I enjoyed reading something but don’t have a lot to say about it. I read this blog post some time back- which complained about the exact same thing, and where the blogger has actually disabled the like button. But stubborn as I am, I ‘liked’ it anyway (Yay for wordpress toolbars?
I really wish there was a way to distinguish the genuine likers of a post from the folks just looking for a shortcut to get their links on my blog..
I agree!!! Sometimes, I get some messages like: “follow for follow?” Urgh…
I used to ignore this kind of comment, but one day I visited back this person and I really read a post and commented. Days after, the person left me a good and decent message on my blog (and don’t “follow for follow?” message).
Regards,
Cristiane.
People ask you that? Wow… I usually take the effort to at least visit the blog of a commenter – the notification email always comes with a few suggestions to start with. I managed to get hooked onto a few good blogs that way
I’m very careful to just send comments to promote my website. But I do love getting comments! And I have received some very serious ones already with advice etc. It’s nice when people take the time to voice their thoughts
Exactly! I have met different people, different cultures, I have traveled around the world in front of my computer! It’s a very good experience!
How funny! I’ve never seen this type of comment on my blog, either. But how great that you checking out their blog led to an actual interaction. I wouldn’t necessarily have expected that!
Honestly, when I saw the comment, I thought: What the f ***? So, I think my attitude was unexpected even for me! hahahahah
It looks ungainly to put a link to your own site for example http://englishmaninitaly.wordpress.com/2012/10/31/sauna-german-style/ Is it possible to add a hyperlink the same way we are able to in a blog? and if so how?
And thanks for the tips.
Your user name is actually your hyperlink, so it isn’t necessary to add it in the comment. Hope that helps!
Hi Becomingcliche, Thanks for the reply. In one comment I wanted to point to a fellow bloggers particular post, and it is a pity that it does not seem possible to add a hyper link.
You can use html in the forums.
click here to see how
brilliant, thank you….
A clever plug, entirely unintentional of course; like this one!
No honest, really, I was only trying to …. ok I hold my hands:)
Haha!
Ps the above was not a plug for my blog.
On another note, however, Pecora Nera, hits the mark for clever Gravatar!
Why?? I am intrigued.
I am amazed that a lot of Gravatars do not link back to the owners wordpress sites. Sometimes to find their site I have to cut and paste their name into www****wordpress.
Pecora Nera, I find that slightly annoying actually. That someone either hasn’t noticed, doesn’t care or some other reason that their Gravatar doesn’t link back to their page! Sometimes I put their name in the http://www….but sometimes I think, bah! Why bother if they don’t care? Its not a difficult step to include a link back.
Hmm, for those users whose Gravatars don’t link to their sites, I wonder if some might be new users who just don’t realize how to set their profile up yet? And of course, some WordPress.com users do not actually have blogs themselves.
I would be one of those… in fact, I haven’t even loaded up a gravatar. Interestingly, I was trying to click on someone who had liked a post on my blog and it didn’t take my anywhere except to her profile and I was very annoyed that I wasn’t able to find her blog and cursing WordPress for not making that easier. Now I know who I should have been cursing!! Don’t know why it didn’t occur to me to check if a person could find MY blog that way. How, exactly, do I do this?
Thanks for your post. I agree with your points and try to follow this etiquette always. I love reading the comments made on my post and thinking up of good replies :+), and I enjoy starting a writerly relationship with those whose blog I comment on. It’s a win/win situation.
Should have kept in “lure” lol!
Elizabeth,
Your points about shameless plugs and manners are key not only to commenting on other blogs but to other social media as well. Another thought is to say hello and let an author know you’re new or how you found the website. It’s a nice way to introduce yourself and maybe even a gain a guest writer or friend.
Marie
Very true about the social media! No matter the forum, polite give-and-take is best. Same as in real-life conversation.
I confess. I don’t always read the comments on a post. Some have so many (which is great!). I dislike the feeling I get when I know someone hasn’t read my post via their comment. On the other hand, the other day I commented to someone they had a cute pup, but it wasn’t their pup. Just photos of a farm they visited and the animals there. I found out when they replied to my comment. I read the post…..somehow I got it messed up. Not sure how? Now, I have a comment forgiveness policy – at least once anyway.
I got into trouble on one blog by not reading ALL the comments. But after reading 15 that all said the same thing, I really couldn’t be bothered. That’s where blogger’s need to do a little housekeeping. You don’t have to approve every single (repetitive) comment. That’s just lazy and irresponsible.
I understand the bother of reading several comments that say the same thing, but I would feel rude if I were to reject a comment because someone agrees with another comment.
I think giving commenters the benefit of the doubt is an excellent policy.
Angelia, Maybe you were still thinking of those cute puppies on my post…
Anyway, as per commenting etiquette, the great thing about blogging is that we can all choose how we wish to interact with other bloggers and not feel pressured; to each his own.
When I started blogging in 2008, we had no Like button and sometimes a post would barely get any comments. The 2011 Daily Post challenge connected me with many new blog friends and I’m always happy to encourage/support other bloggers. When my fellow bloggers like or comment on my blog, I’m grateful for it and make the effort to reciprocate.
It matters less to me why/how quickly/how slowly they responded to my post. It means more to me that they took the time to stop by and like and/or comment and I appreciate the gesture. I find it odd that some think other bloggers like their posts just to gain traffic. Traffic building is far more complex than that and it takes a lot more work to gain SEO and even organic traffic. Since Hurricane Sandy knocked out our power, I’ve written a lot less blog posts and visited fewer blogs but my traffic remains strong. If we can be appreciative of our fellow bloggers, we might have a different experience. The way I see it, spammers troll, fellow bloggers visit. As Elizabeth suggested, “giving commenters the benefit of the doubt is an excellent policy.”
I concur!
Eliz
[redacted]
Was this an intentional example of an irrelevant off-topic comment? Or a clever Republican trick to put undecided voters off Obama? Mmmm
Didn’t phase me, when saw it was OT, stopped reading.
I am curious ad well. Great example. Of rudeness
Gee, did TARANPALBHULLAR # just make my case for more responsible comment moderating or what?!
Sorry about that one, folks.
This is great but it’s wonderful to see it all written down so clearly. I do try to follow these tips personally as it only seems natural. One thing that I always wonder is, if when someone clicks the “like” button but doesn’t leave a comment, have they really read your post. Jen
Not if they “like” ten posts in a row, all within the same minute or two.
Talk about blatant!
Those who have the habit to “like” and then also comment are sometimes those who only “like”. Them, I believe.
please don’t count me in
i have this habit of opening at least five, max ten blogs at a time, on a “new tab” of course. maybe because i am impatient, i want them ready when i’m done with the first one.
should i encounter long blogs, i sure take my time.
and i don’t like a post just for the heck of liking it or “lure” {elizabeth should have kept it
} bloggers to my site.
when i hit the like button, i really like it. i had moments where i was rendered speechless. sometimes you just have to stand in awe of a masterpiece.
Speed reader, to get it all done in one minute!
“should i encounter long blogs, i sure take my time.”
i wouldn’t put my name on something i never really liked, much less understood, nor comment on something that might offend, just to place my two cents on it. that won’t be nice.
further, it’ll be like “trouble for signing a contract without reading it first”
You are absolutely right. However, I have several who come by my site, like 10 or 20 posts in ONE MINUTE, and move on. I have visited them and they do not like people like me, but they have not noticed that about my site, yet.
That was blatant. 
Glad to hear a different side of things. Come see mine, if you want.
In my opinion, it could be that you like it… but either you are to busy at the moment or to lazy to comment.
Yes, they are the ones I’m talking about. It is obvious that they haven’t read a thing! Most people do comment.
Right, again!
I “like” without comments. Sometimes, I like the style or appreciate the effort on tackling a difficult subject. I think of a “like” as a smile or a nod, quiet encouragement.
I agree, that is fine, especially when you know that person would normally comment.
I can be heavy-handed with the like button myself. I always mean it, but sometimes I have more to say and am just too lazy to comment. I’m trying to get better about that!
Ha ha, well if you “like” with sentiment then that is OK. Jen
I like it when bloggers some times relate themselves with my posts and comment on my post with events they’ve come across in my life. I comment on a post either if I really really like it or I have my two cents to contribute to the post.
Very interesting post and I totally agree. I’m still new to blogging but I find it rude when someone goes through and likes all of your posts within 2 minutes! They obviously haven’t read them. My personal policy is to only like if I’ve really read the post and actually like it!
i’ve found that the golden rule works really well for commenting and liking. i try to only leave the types of comments (i.e. thoughtful, relevant, etc.) that i would want to receive on my blog.
Good point about “relevant” comments. I was an early enthusiast of the Google+ social site and quickly gained 5,000 followers. However, after only a few months I quit the site because too many people commented on my postings with an unthinking “nice”, “cute” or “awesome”… descriptions which hopefully could never be appropriately used to describe my images! I made the point of always commenting on others’ postings with at least 140 characters of text – a self-imposed minimum because I loathe Twitter and what I feel it is doing by abbreviating the English language – and often with more than 140 words. Written praise and constructive criticism can take a great deal of time, and one does it to be encouraging and helpful, but those three very (ahem!) American (oops!) words I quoted earlier certainly had the opposite on me.
Your comment wasn’t nice, cute or awesome. It was thoughtful and had substance. As such it triggered my thought process and want to respond. That is what comments should be about.
I am fairly new to blogging and am very impressed with this community. I have described blogging to my non-blogging friends as Facebook, etc. with intelligence and substance. I assume that likes mean that people actually like what I posted and a comment is to affirm what I said or add a different perspective. Making this assumption makes me feel good.
Ed Buziak, somehow I walk away from your comment feeling slightly insulted. Since there are users from all over the world, it might be a good idea to be respectful. Even if one is playing, or teasing, saying something with a hint of humor can go wrong if your hint isn’t well recieved.
Have to add this:
I have one true follower, who, when she first found my site, READ EVERY SINGLE POST AND PLACED A COMMENT ON EACH. It took her DAYS, but I was totally touched and awed at her sweetness, to do such a thing for me.
Needless to say, we’ve become great blogging friends.
How wonderful! That is the type of reader every blogger dreams of!
She is a dream come true. We share first names, religious heritage, even favorite childhood TV shows. I feel extremely blessed and if you want to view her site instead of mine, let me know — I’d get the same kick out of that as if you came to mine.
Katherine–that is truly a wonderful and amazing thing to have received; someone willing to take the time and give the effort to get to know you through your writing!
As you said, you are truly blessed!
You are so right and I SO know it!
Thanks, Janice
she sounds really dedicated, can we borrow her?
i actually did that once for a friend of mine who biked with his dad and sister and dad’s friend from Cape Town [South Africa] all the way up through Egypt and then across Europe and they had a blog and i joined it a few weeks into it and read through all the posts and commented on most of them cos they obviously put a lot of work into it and there were not a lot of comments and firstly the blogs were great [here they are actually if anyone wants a fun adventure - Julian is a funny guy - http://4bikes4singapore.wordpress.com%5D and i wanted them to know that i was reading and appreciating and i caught up with them after a few days and it was kind of like i got to journey with them from the safety of my computer [far less punctures!]
Punctures? Ha. From bad roads, right? I’m guessing . . .
Thanks for this reply! My friend is very special to me. Someday, I will drive my truck about 1000 miles to her house and we will hug each other, eat forbidden foods, and stay up all night talking.
yup completely. or no roads at all. so great that you can ‘meet someone’ online and then connect in real life and grow a real friendship – that is exciting! sounds like a great trip to make – you should do it!
I will. I’m already stockpiling gifts to take along!
i’m kinda new here, barely a month
so far, people have been kind. and i’ve learned a thing or two from the people who’ve viewed my posts.
I usually go for the funny comment just because that’s how I’d respond in person. I always try to be myself and to be kind and respectful especially since I’m on someone else’s turf. I have a great community of commenters on my blog, and I think that’s in large part to WP being such a friendly and welcoming place.
My funny / edgy comments sometimes come out the wrong way……I see drawbacks to being anonymous – it’s easy to go a little too far, especially if the other person doesn’t get that you have a goofy, lying, playful and sarcastic thing going. I mostly read but don’t comment…….I have pretty much broken all these rules. When a toddler stumbles over and grabs your crotch, it is usually shrugged off, but the Neophyte Blog Dude…….no way!
I think everyone should receive a commenting pamphlet when applying for an internet service. I don’t like shameless plugging especially when it’s so obvious. I mean, can’t they even try and pretend to leave a small effort of commenting about the last line at least? It’s really sad to see a lot of rude people on the internet hiding behind their usernames — on yahoo news for example.
Cerrise, I agree completely! Yahoo! comments can get pretty raw. Some are lighthearted and even funny, others are straight abusive. Having a conversation about the news would be interesting if we could remove all the hate and abuse.
Excellent post on commenting etiquette. I have encountered a few who “like” one of my posts for the first time. So I go to their blog and discover very interesting posts. Great way to “meet” fellow bloggers.
it really warms my heart when bloggers, who are really good at their fields, liking my works and giving advice. i was once told, when you’re in the presence of someone great; shut up, listen & learn. ain’t that great?
“Mind your manners.” What iof you’re not one to mind your manners in person, necessarily?
I was just going to add a bit of blogging etiquette, and your comment is the perfect jumping off place. You bring up a really great point, even if it’s in jest.
One of my pet peeves is when people swear when commenting on my posts. I know coarse words are very much a part of the culture, but I moderate them out on my blog, even from regular contributors.
We can say whatever we want in comments, but if we want them to see the light of day and become a part of a conversation, a good rule is to keep it clean and polite, especially if it’s a blog we’ve never visited before.
I totally agree–if you wouldn’t say something to a new acquaintance in person (with whom you want to develop a relationship), why would you put it in writing? But that may be just me, ‘cuss words’ make me cringe–especially since there are much more creative words to express yourself!
Well, I also advised being yourself!
Perhaps a balancing subheading, such as “Moderation in everything”?
Excellent post and points, Elizabeth. It is NOT the number of comments we leave, but what we leave in those comments that matters.
I had long suspected, based on the sterile nature of comments they posted, that a few habitual visitors did not enjoy their cyber excursions to SLTW. I could almost hear them dragging their feet down the cyber corridor each time they came round.
Instead of dropping by for a cozy cyber chat, they popped in, did a bit of speed reading, and left post-haste.
Like paying a weekly visit to a dowager aunt out of familial obligation (or the desire for testate inheritance), they tossed comments into the reply box at regular intervals to maintain the appearance of reciprocity. A politically correct “tit for tat.”
I decided ”enough of that!” I don’t need reluctant visitors dropping by to boost my head count ~ that benefits no one. So I conducted an experiment.
You can read about it here:
http://nrhatch.wordpress.com/2012/03/28/reverse-reciprocity/
I have fewer “reluctant visitors” these days . . . most comments show true engagement with the topic at hand. Yay!
You gave a good run down of different commenters. I have not yet spotted reluctant ones on my blog which has so few comments, anyway. I saw a comment on a friend’s blog that really irked me because it was so obvious that the post was not READ THOROUGHLY. Plus the fact that nothing was said that related to anything specific from the post. Would you not agree that this was an epitome of a worthless comment? Thanks for your comment!
Thanks, Shofar. Sometimes a comment can be a bit “off topic” without being worthless.
That said, when a comment is inappropriate, or so far off topic that it is CLEAR that the commenter didn’t read the post, I treat the comment as SPAM and delete it. Problem solved.
I guess what bugged me was that this person did not like the post, but did not say what he disagreed with. Yet had he read the entire post, he may not have reacted negatively. But you’re right, his comment would have qualified as SPAM. So I advised my friend to forget about it and delete it.
I’m new to blogging and noticed that Word Press removes SPAM. What exactly is the definition for SPAM or how does WP recognize SPAM?
Hilarious! And a great example of my third tip – how could we not click through and check your post out?
Thanks, Elizabeth! In reliance on Blog Etiquette Tip #3, I included a link to my “Lab Rats” post. Glad you enjoyed.
As a matter of fact some people make comments to others blog just to gain followers. Once their blog been followed then those persons would stop make a comment and stop visiting the blog that they used to visit very often. What a trick!
Thanks for your insights. Sometimes, as in this case, reading through the other comments before leaving mine, represents an investment of time that I simply do not have. In cases like that, I frequently leave a “like” and move on. There is no hard and fast rule on etiquette, is there? All the best, M
Margarita, I agree that time is sometimes an issue. I put the like button my blogs so that readers can do just that, click “like” and move on. If they have have a thought, then they have a place to share it.
Very informative post, thanks. I sometimes get only link in comment section, without thanks.
Thank you for posting the etiquette of commenting. The first idea is rather time consuming! There is a way for me to read all the comments on a post and that way would require many minutes of my time. When I read a post it is because I am interested in what the author wrote and not necessarily what others have to say about it although, I may be interested in a comment thread. So if I were to follow the “rule” here and read all comments before I comment, then I won’t be making many comments because it would take too much of my time. My comment would be for the author, not for the reader, unless of course I was interested in the comment thread and therefore would give my response accordingly. So this rule keeps readers from commenting if there is a long comment thread. Is there any way you could change the etiquette rule?
These are “tips” not rules. Be guided by your own intuition.
Elizabeth (should I say Liz? that may be rude)
I skimmed ( I mean Read thoroughly) your post before commenting, and feel I can contribute something of value. I’m not sure exactly what. Just something more than a “like” or enjoyed your post.
Getting past the shameless plug [http://makeapowerfulpoint.com <-best blog ever!]
Here's my real point. I've found some posts and types of posts naturally invite comments. Either by being provocative, or posing questions in the piece. That to me is part of the style and personality of the blog. Just as there are certain people that give a "keep off the grass" signal in real life, there's a certain style and personality of writing (one I can't put my finger on) that I think gives a "no comments please" signal as well.
Ha! Well put. You’re right – some bloggers do somehow seem to discourage conversation. Although it’s possible to close comments on your posts altogether, so if a blogger hasn’t, presumably they do want them.
I think one surefire way to discourage comments is not to respond to them when you get them.
True – although as you point out in your post, some are so offtopic or odd that even thank you seems like a bizarre response.
I appreciate it when commenters share something about themselves. For example, I wrote about plastic usage in counties I lived in and they shared how they their cities deal with plastic usage as well. I think it is good to have an engaging question somewhere in the post so readers can have a starting point on how to comment substantially. On the other hand, I also appreciate short comments, even a simple “nice post” or “love it” because sometimes the best thoughts are expressed concisely.
This is such great advice. I love leaving comments and hope that people look forward to them. I have a ceratin commenter on my blog that I just love. Every time I write a post, I start immediately hoping that she’ll leave a comment because they’re always so good. I strive to make someone else as happy with my comments as she makes me.
http://wendysworksdotcom.wordpress.com/ Thanks! hehehe Just joking. Very informative post.
I find new blogs to read by clicking hyperlinked usernames on thoughtful comments on blogs like this.
Fun. http://rochellekarina.com/2012/11/06/2127/
Thank you so much for the tips. The shameless plugging is one that specifically irks me. Have they nothing to contribute to the conversation? Etiquette is a wonderful tool for building relationships, I wonder why people don’t use it properly more often.
Thanks for the information. I will certainly try some of the suggestions…
You should add spell check! Nothing worse than havingvan excellent point made with several words spelled incorrectly
Mass Coordinator, I like the idea of a spell checker. I always worry that something will slip past my eye. I read often and do not notice most typos, but I worry all the same that someone might think me stupid for making the error.
I rely on my spell checker. Most browsers have plugins that work on wordpress. I’m using one now. It’s a real lifesaver when I’m drunk.
I have a spellchecker for the blog, but the comments are not checked. I could write comment on a processor app. first and transfer, but I don’t always have so much time as that.
I use a draft blog post on wordpress and copy paste it between tabs. A bit easier than using another application.
Yes – excellent point! Spelling matters.
I comment on blogs I find hostile. Particularly, I find those Christian blogs which hate gay people, and criticise their Biblical interpretation or theology or logic from a Christian point of view. I want them to know that there are Christians who feel differently. Sometimes, though, after being told I will go to Hell, I just try to wind them up.
I believe in free speech, and would not want WordPress to censor them- or even me- as a hostile or incorrect blogger; but part of free speech is ridicule and contumely. I do not like anti-gay bloggers just getting away with views I hate.
I also find Christian blogs friendly to LGBT, and seek to encourage them. And I have found blogs I have read from the beginning because I love what is written.
And some of them are so easy to WIND UP.
Non Shameless plugs are an art in themselves. I think the best way to develop it to pay comments forward. If you find a subject interesting, or find someone writing about the same subject as yourself recommend other blogs you think they might like. It’s a great start to building up your own blogging community . Use shared interests to build conversations.
Does that make sense?
Absolutely. The best way to build blogging relationships is to actively seek out blogs on topics that interest you.
How’s this for anticipation? On 3rd November I posted an article I called: ‘The Etiquette of Visiting and the Whys and Wherefores of Stats.’
Of course WordPress often gives encouraging talks about such matters but my article was influenced by a comment made by a fellow blogger about the shift in his priorities (I’d been feeling a bit low at the time and he is a very supportive type of person). His comments made me realise that I had been coming to the same sort of conclusions myself, and just needed a like-minded person to voice them, Responses made by my electronic friends to my article just confirmed to me that I am not alone in my thinking about the importance of community and the’ time that it takes to build up solid connections of your own.
http://marysomnibus.wordpress.com/
At first I was not big fan of LIKE button. Now I understand practicality. What to say about a brilliant haiku, re-quotation or photograph. There are times to engage and times to just appreciate. Great post. Thank-you.
There are times to engage and times to just appreciate.
Well put!
LIKE
Very true – sometimes you have nothing to add and just want to support.
I wrote a post last week about ‘liking’ because my browser needed updating and I found I was unable to ‘like’. This meant I had to leave a comment after reading a post – even if that comment was ‘I like this post’.
My post got a lot of hits and turned into a debate on whether or not people should ‘like’ and comment, or just ‘like’. It was a really interesting (and sometimes fiery) discussion!
You can check it out here http://diannegray.wordpress.com/2012/10/28/what-is-a-like/
I remember getting into the habit, when commenting on Romi Moondi`s blog, of wishing her well in a fortune cookie kind of way, always related to the post`s subject: “May you find an equally intriguing and magical city as NY. Boston, maybe? I`m thinking Good Will Hunting meets Romi Be Writing” was my last one. She always appreciates little bits like that.
Reblogged this on Duffboy and commented:
I miss comments on my blog. Although I enjoy the likes (I`ve yet to be reblogged), the comments are extra special.
This is what I always like with WordPress. It gives all the support we need. Leaving links for related topics is a creative way of inviting readers to your site. Thank you for this one.
For a while I followed the blog of a writer who I liked very much. I’d comment on his blogs sometimes, keeping it brief, friendly, and conversational…and only once did he ever reply to me. And sometimes he only had two comments on his whole blog. Eventually I unfollowed him.
I agree that the interaction will bring traffic to your own blog, but even beyond that, the sense of community that you build when you and your followers are all reading one another’s blogs and giving feedback is priceless. Replying to a comment and visiting other blogs are simple courtesies in my book.
I often don’t bother leaving comments because I get torn between having too little and too much to say, thank you for your list of tips
Also, if we’re talking etiquette, I’m wondering about the etiquette of ‘reblogging’. When I was a newbie I asked someone why she didn’t want to be reblogged. She explained to me that although it was a flattering way of saying ‘like’ it also meant that the attribution disappears after a couple of reblogs. So, to reblog or not? That is the question. What do people here think is the answer?
Thanks for this, it’s very helpful. I used to feel terribly bad when people just click the like but wouldn’t comment or just clicked it but didn’t really open or read the blogs. But now I understand and just make myself believe that it’s not them, it’s me. I should just make all the effort to make my blogs interesting and worthy to be even ‘clicked’ at. But for as long as I enjoy reading and looking at others’ blog, I’m fine
I really don’t understand the dislike of likes. Though some people may click like on a post they haven’t even read, I think most likers are well-intentioned and leave their like as a way of saying “I stopped by” or “I agree, but don’t have much to add.”
I agree, now I know, my apologies.
That’s why I don’t feel that way anymore. Now, I appreciate everything, if its just the “likes”. That’s just what I used to feel, I apologize. Thank you for the enlightenment.
I must confess- I have NOT read all 111 comments prior to mine before adding my two cents. I do try to skim through some of the prior comments, but if there are many, I just can’t. I always try to congratulate Freshly Pressed bloggers who have caught my eye that day, and add something witty or positive about their post or their blog in general. I try not to shamelessly plug my own blog, but every now and then when I know I have a post that’s extremely relevant to the one on which I’m commenting, I confess that I do.
The comments that catch my eye are the ones that say something clever or well-thought out about the post. The best part of comments is the way they build the blogging community. I feel like I really know my regular commenters, as if an old friend has dropped in for a visit, even though I don’t know most of them in real life.
Thanks!
I was able to scan through all these comments in exactly 30 minutes and I must say, it’s like going through Commenting 101 and 102 together with all the prerequisites and the extra-curricular wisdom, and I learned a lot. Thank you for this and all the comments.
I like comments that show the person even read something or looked at photos more closely as well as an unknown fact related to the blog post. My style: Sometimes I say alot, sometimes not.
Reblogged this on Gestiondeeventos.
I have to say “wow”–this was a great post AND engaging comments! As a ‘newbie’ blogger I know I am still learning the ropes but your tips–especially about making sure the profile is complete–will make a huge difference in my approach. Thank you to the many comments as well that opened my eyes to things I had not thought of (especially reverse reciprocity)….even if it took forever to read ALL of them!
Excellent tips! Have already started fleshing out my profile and I like the note about being yourself. I have a bad habit of trying to sound overly formal instead of just being me, which is frankly way more appealing to people. Stressed formality can be a turn-off.
If someone new “likes” a post of mine – and of course ALL my posts are VERY likeable! – without leaving a comment, I usually check out their blog, especially the “About” page. If there are a lot of comments on the “About” page from other people saying “thanks for liking my post, I’m liking you back”, I conclude that the “like” was just a bait to get me to visit their blog. Maybe I’m jumping to a wrong conclusion?
Здравейте!Намирам идеята за интересна. Но първо искам да споделя едно мое разочарование – виждам, че важната тема за децата ни вече е приключила Мисля, че бързо препускаме из интернет и това може да бъде за нас някой ден една лоша шега. Такава съм аз- често сълзлива Иначе съм голям образ- започнах да пиша коментарите си под мъжки псевдоним.После се усетих,че това може да предизвика смешно объркване и се представих в блога си като жена каквато съм Имам съвсем слаба компютърна грамотност обаче продължавам смело да действам. Няма да се учудя, ако направя някой сериозен гаф.Не зная дума английски, но това не пречи на моята самоувереност С една дума- като се вгледам в себе си и осъзнавам колко съм смешна И често пъти коментарите ми са съдбоносни и трагични Такава съм, за сега ще се зарадвам, ако се разделим с усмивка Пошегувайте се с мен- доста съм комична.
Ayuda trastornos de ansiedad (Anxiety)
http://trastornosdeansiedad.wordpress.com/
I’m gonna try it
i have an amateur blog and my heart skips a beat when someone likes or comments. it’s sad to know though that people only do such things to showcase their blogs. i hope people are nicer than that.
commenting too is something i am fond of, especially when i find a person very fascinating. the way a person writes tells more about him, prolly more than his about page could ever describe ‘em! no to fake commenters! rawr.
commenters unite. let’s make this blogosphere a better world. we hope!
Аз харесвам коментара на Бубу.Също смятам, че личностите са по-важни от блоговете Като че ли всички се интересуваме само от себе си.Аз съм в интернет, защото искам да общувам с хора от целия свят, да зная какви са техните вълнения и мнения Според мен трябва повече да контактуваме помежду си, да се опитаме да бъдем силна общност от личности
I have a self hosted blog, so I use WordPress software, but I don’t have access to some features like have a “Like” option on my posts. I used to envy the WordPress sites I would see that would get a lot of likes, but now I’m not so sure. While sometimes I would like to get those “likes”, it does seem as though some people abuse the system by just posting hundreds of “likes” on as many blogs as possible just to get their little gravatar icon on as many screens as they can.
I do use the “like” button myself, but I try to limit it to just using it on photo posts, the weekly photo challenge for example. Otherwise, I try to leave a comment.
One other thing. I do wonder if some people are just a little shy or apprehensive about leaving a comment ? Maybe some people are perfectly happy with their circle of friends they have developed with their blog and when they do come across a new blog maybe they are not so sure if they will be welcomed, so they just use the “Like” button instead of writing out a comment.
LOVE IT!
As a blogger, I find this to actually be one of the hardest things to do, for one reason alone — TIME! I love reading blogs and reading in general… but when you have a full-time job (as a writer, mind you!), and then have to fit in writing / moderating comments on your OWN blog during your off-work hours… it’s tough to also fit in reading / commenting on all the other GREAT blogs out there. But I have to remind myself, too, that it’s important to MY writing to engage in other blogs. Why? 1) Gives me perspective on what’s going on around me; 2) Helps me gain new ideas / fresh insight for my own writing; 3) Enriches me because I’m actively playing a part in the writing community at large. After all, if I want others to engage on my blog, why would I expect any less of myself?
Great post!
i completely heard this which is why i have limited myself to a few choice blogs i follow and then on occasion when a comment sparks some interest i will visit a new blog but there is just so much goodness out there it is difficult to choose…
wow! I am so grateful I’ve read this blog. I’m new in this site and I still don’t know what to do especially about “liking” and commenting. Elizabeth, thank you so much for the tips.
this is a great and helpful post – i love receiving comments and so because of that i love to give them but definitely try to make them meaningful and helpful/encouraging [unless i really didn't dig something - if i have something constructive to say i will often inbox the person] or something funny but yeah the encouragement of someone thinking what you sad was worth reading really spurs you on to write more and better…
Sometimes it is challenging to leave an original comment, especially when so many others proceed you. If I find what I am reading is marginal i usually try to leave a positive comment, but no one directly reflecting my opinion. No one wants harsh criticism in their comments for others to read and have their opinion affected.
You have excellent reminders for each of us as we try to enjoy the community of bloggers and build relationships. i appreciate the knowledge share!
This is one of the few posts I read completely including all of the comments. So I obviously must have ‘liked’ it.
I’m running a couple of blogs (8) here on wordpress and I’m getting some likes immediately after posting. I always visit their blog if they’re new to mine to check them out. Most are disappointing because judging by their blogs, they really can’t be interested in my stuff and were actually just luring. I’ve even acquired some strange followers of the aforementioned kind. I don’t care about them, to be honest.
I hardly leave any comments because I either don’t have the time (it takes me a while because I’m not a native speaker of English) or – in most cases – don’t want to repeat what the other commenters have already said. I do leave ‘likes’, though, and do so only after I have read a post. I also leave likes in a row, especially on photoblogs, because I visit some of them only once or twice a month. Nothing wrong with that in my opinion if your ‘like’ is an honest one.
I actually wrote a post in my blog about how I use the “like” feature. For me it is a tool to help me keep track of posts that I either want to reblog and add my own thoughts, or else link to in my own writing. But I read most of the post before hitting like. For me it’s not a means to increase stats, but an organizational tool. And once I have reblogged a post or linked to it, i unlike because again, that feature is an organizational tool, and the fact that I reblogged a post or linked to it means I like it.
Andrea
Andrea
thank you, I found that an interesting post and hopefully one which will help me in my new blog, to make it interesting as well as intellectual.
es muy cierto, a veces para comentar escriben con un vocabulario inadecuado, no son concretos al decir las cosas, siempre se deja a un lado, pero ahora es como fundamental escribir el comentario adecuademente y tener conocimiento de lo que se ha leido !
This is a great article, Elizabeth. Thank you for taking the time to make the information clear and easy to understand. Very useful! When commenting in a thread I try always to be encouraging. There is too much negativity. So even if I feel that criticism is in order I make every effort to say it in a kind way.
Good tips that I wish some bloggers/commenters would observe. Shameless plug only makes sense if the other person’s blog post is same topic or will dovetail in as an addendum. Should be used very sparingly. I especially hope that some bloggers would return an occasional visit especially for blogs where I’ve commented meaningfully for them on multiple posts over several months. It’s only good manners and keeps the good blogging espirit de corps up.
Thank you for the considerate tips here Elizabeth, having read a few posts concerning commenting etiquette from other bloggers I’m acquantanted with, I’d say you’re surely right on in the need for sincerity. Still I find myself having to work on leaving shorter comments, perhaps the technique of leaving a few sentences straight to the point on the topic with a link tying it in will prove helpful – sounds more reasonable anyway, so I will definetly keep that in mind vs. the paragraph type I’ve been prone to!
I also find other commenter’s input helpful; I would “like” them too were there such a button!
Very good advice to read another’s blog or post thoroughly before commenting. I’ve had others make that mistake on my blogs … annoying.